Wednesday, January 31, 2007
My Crazy Mixed Up World
I hate staying at home. It makes me so lazy. I swear I don't do anything when I'm home for several days in a row but lay around and want to sleep. I know that this time could be much more valuable for us than it is but I'm also having a hard time with homeschooling lately. I just can't get on the ball and I'm not sure why. Sure there's a lot of different things that I could blame it on but what it comes right down to is being more disciplined. I know that it isn't hurting dd to not do bookwork - heck she's almost 2 years ahead now and has been playing a lot of educational games online lately but it just really bothers me that we're not doing what I think that we're suppose to be doing. Hopefully I'll get us back on track now that activities are back in swing but this child led stuff really isn't working too well for my home. I tried the unschooling route and now I see that it's not for us. While I do a lot of educational and time worthy things for myself, dd just isn't motivated to do the same for herself. This just proves to me that unschooling doesn't work for everyone and that my dd won't play with things unless I show her them or encourage her to do so. I really need to get back in gear here and I'm feeling really bad that I haven't been doing so. Of course this doesn't mean that we have to do textbook work each and every day but hell I need to start doing something. We did some stuff yesterday but Monday and today were a total waste. Anyhow, I really need to stop beating myself up here and get back on the right road. Thanks for letting me vent!
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3 comments:
Oh, how I can relate.
When you said that you want to stay home and sleep for several days, I'm thinking maybe you want to check your thyroid or hormone levels? Sleep is also a way to cope with stress. So, maybe you're going through some stress and you need to find your way to figure out what makes you passionate and want to get up and LIVE?
As for the unschooling thing - unschooling is NOT sitting around doing your own thing and waiting for your kids to get involved. That's something else entirely.
Unschooling is getting INTO life and LIVING life like you got a fire under your butt. Unschooling is knowing your kid, doing things you know work for her, doing things that you know inspire her, cooperating with her, pushing her when you know she really wants it, letting her be when you know she needs space - being in tune with yourself and with your daughter, that's unschooling.
Unschooling isn't WHAT you do, it's why. Why are you sitting on the couch all day? It isn't because you're unschooling. There's something else.
A lot of unschoolers use textbooks and workbooks and classes and structured learning. Heck, if that's what you like to do, and it makes you and your daughter motivated to live life, then do it!
Basically, unschooling is to do things that make you and her want to live and do and to be and to smile. If that means doing lesson plans, great!
Anyway, all that said, it doesn't matter a damn if what you do is called "unschooling" or any other thing. All that matters is that you're doing what works. So, you might want to re-evaluate what makes your daughter happy, and what makes YOU happy. What makes you happy? Why aren't you doing what makes you happy? Is your daughter doing what makes her happy? And when I say happy, I mean, "So DAMN glad to be alive."
I've been where you are, and it's not fun. But it's an awesome opportunity to learn. Isn't that what life's all about? Constantly learning?
Good luck :) and BIG hugs.
I do have some thyroid problems and I also have SAD (seasonal affectiveness disorder) which starts to get to me at this time of the year. I take meds for my thyroid but it just gets really difficult for me with my SAD at this time of the year - I have good days then I have bad. Thankfully I'm doing better these past few days though.
I commented on your definition of unschooling in a post up toward the top. I kind of went into a rant there but I'm glad you've taken the time to post this information for me. I really am almost rediscovering myself lately. It's funny... I never knew I was such a "geek." I love doing artsy stuff (painting, cross stitching, drawing, coloring felt posters, origami...), writing (obviously LOL) and spending time on the computer. I also enjoy taking my dd places to let her explore. She's been seeing me do these things and is really starting to come out of her shell. In fact, I just posted about how great a day at home was for us today.
I'm working hard to tune into my dd's needs and I have a great friend who proclaims she unschools and shares much the same philosophy that you do. I'm really learning a lot from her. I can't do some of the things she does because they don't work for us but other things she's really inspired me in and I greatly value and appreciate her for that.
Somewhere some way I've gotten the idea that all unschoolers completely frown upon any thought of text books or work books. Things that are helpful for us. I don't push dd to do them daily anymore bc we're finding other ways of learning things that are working better for us since we just hate structure and complete organization but I still find them helpful.
You don't know how much I have truly appreciated you reaching out to me and sharing your heart with me in this way. I'm off to try to finish some work because I love what I do (freelance writing) and it'll make me feel better knowing that my notes are organized LOL
THANK YOU AGAIN & HUGS !!!
It sounds like you have several things going on in your life that might cause stress but don't let school for your daughter be one of them. At five years old you can accomplish all that "needs" to be accomplished in just a couple of hours a day. So, if you don't have school for a day or two but you spend a whole day doing things another day it's going to be okay.
So many homeschooling parents (me included!!!) went to public school so we are so used to following that method. We think we need to spend eight hours a day sitting down and doing school work, that we have to have school every day - Monday through Friday, that certain subjects need to be taught on certain days, etc. The beauty of homeschooling is that you can make your schedule fit your family. You can do what works best for you.
Don't worry about what others are doing or whether or not you're "keeping up" - you need to do what's right for you and your daughter. If workbooks work - great! If field trips work- great! If videos and books work- great! You get the idea right? :)
Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that you shouldn't put so much pressure on yourself. Love your child and spend time teaching her things - everything else will fall into place. :)
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